“You do not have a soul, you are a soul. You have a body.”
—C.S. Lewis
Soul or ego? After asking myself this often, I’ve concluded that we do not choose one at the exclusion of the other, they are both integral parts of ourselves. Yet, these two facets typically have different priorities and which one we give our allegiance to creates a very different focus to our life, even when doing exactly the same activities. For example, egos like definitives, comfort, same-ness, accomplishments, and end results. Souls adore depth, experiences, growth, journeys, and expansion.
I once had a photo portrait session with a talented photographer who had taken one of my “Calling Council” workshops. I note the latter, because she wanted the portrait to show that side of me; the teacher, my ancient self, my inner shaman, and may I say my soul. I brought with me a selection of feathers, wings and skulls. Seeing the end result (see below) was an interesting experience. I could see the power I normally only feel, while simultaneously realizing a photo is simply an image of a moment in time. Our lives are a string of ongoing moments—some powerful, some weak, some in the middle. My belief is that we are eternal beings having the experience of being human. As a person we present ourselves to the outside through an image, that is what the ego does for a living. Sometimes this is done consciously, sometimes unconsciously. Either way, we are responsible for both the image we present and its alignment to our unseen soul. We are not in control, however, of what others think about or perceive our image. I have many people who underestimate me, and others that overestimate me. This helps me know that I am the only authority of myself and life. In contrast, the first half of my life was spent making my decisions based on my best guess of what other’s thought of me—not always consciously. While I am still more comfortable being seen positively and do weigh how others react to me, I now truly know people’s understanding of me has more to do with them. All I can do is remain true to my inner self and leave the rest up to the outside. Anything else brings confusion and disappoint.
Ultimately, wholeness includes both ego and soul. Just like the whole of a body has both legs and arms. They serve different purposes, but it’s most helpful when they are moving in the same direction. If they aren’t and your feet are walking forwards, yet your arms keep moving backwards, the balance of the whole will be disturbed and you go nowhere. Conversely, when working together they are a powerful team that can go in any direction. We are born whole. Over time, we begin to shut areas of ourself down. Perhaps we sense that if we show our whole selves we will be shunned for being too big, too much, too sensitive or not enough of this or that. In other words, we may think we will not be accepted due to our differences. Even if this is true (which is doubtful), is it more important to have the acceptance of others at the expense of being true to oneself? That does not seem a fair trade to me. So, we continue to quest for alignment of our inner and outer. There are as many ways to do this as there are numbers of people willing to work on it.
After a couple years off, I’ve decided it is time again to offer the “Calling Council” workshop mentioned above. For six consecutive weeks, we will journey to different facets of ourselves in order to become aware of where they are aligned and where they may be conflicting. This will be held in an intimate setting in Saratoga Springs. To find out more visit the webpage by clicking here.
Whether you come to call council among yourself in my workshop, I encourage you to consider if your whole being is working in unity. If you find conflict, consider how you may align your inner and outer, soul and ego, body and spirit. There is no end destination on this quest, instead its ongoing. Still, those moments of flow when all of you is walking forward are worth the effort.
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